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Newest Member: Acamus

General :
Dry Affair?

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 Jaakus (original poster new member #47089) posted at 10:32 PM on Sunday, June 29th, 2025

Has anyone heard this term used before my ww used it in an internet search.

She first searched for "denied affair activities now trying to be honest"

Then searched "dry affair"

Then searched "sharing all details of affair with husband"

Given this context I was wondering if anyone had heard the term before?

posts: 47   ·   registered: Mar. 8th, 2015
id 8871478
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Owl6118 ( member #42806) posted at 12:25 AM on Monday, June 30th, 2025

It's likely borrowed from AA, where the phrase is "dry drunk." A dry drunk is an alcoholic who is for the time being not drinking, but who is not yet doing the work of recovery. Someone who is white knuckling sobriety.

So, I would think it means "white knuckling" no contact, still craving contact with the AP or romanticizing the affair or the AP.

Note, sometimes early on a wayward can want with their intentions and rational mind to be over this phase, but they are aware they are still detoxing -- stuck in a place they don't want to be. The other two search terms suggest that someone is aware they are still white knuckling are also struggling to end trickle truth.

These can be signs of progress actually, but, they are also signs of a wayward struggling in the aftermath of DDay.

posts: 351   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2014
id 8871480
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Lostinmarriage ( new member #82640) posted at 12:30 AM on Monday, June 30th, 2025

The context sounds ominous. So sorry you have to deal with this stress. My internet search confirmed what I suspected. It is a different way to describe an emotional affair.
Hang in there. Lots of people here offer good advice based on experience.
How do you perceive the state of your marriage?

posts: 28   ·   registered: Dec. 28th, 2022
id 8871481
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Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 2:20 PM on Monday, June 30th, 2025

Sounds like she's desperately looking for a way to minimize it and make it sound "not so bad".

And I will say, if she's currently grasping at confession straws - she is not close to a safe partner.

BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades-2 adult children. Multiple DDays w/same LAP until I told OBS 2018- Cease & Desist sent spring 2021 "Hello–My name is Chaos–You f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"

posts: 4027   ·   registered: Oct. 13th, 2017   ·   location: East coast
id 8871504
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